


To The Rescue

by xoneworldx



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Funny, Humor, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Two Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-08
Updated: 2015-03-07
Packaged: 2018-03-16 20:42:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3502130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xoneworldx/pseuds/xoneworldx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Minseok was brave. Luhan was brave, too. Sometimes. And there was just something about heckling each other that was so enjoyable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. To The Rescue (1/2)

Minseok was never really one to be afraid of anything, according to his friends and sometimes even himself. Heights were never a bother, snakes and sharks were cool, and the dark never seemed overly freaky to him whilst the rest of his friends always cowered in fear to those things. Minseok could probably cross paths with a serial killer covered in blood and holding a chainsaw and he wouldn’t be scared for his life.

However, he had only one weakness.

That goddamn spider on the ceiling above his bed.

It had been there for a little while, to Minseok’s knowledge. He had been minding his own business reading volume 8 of Fruits Basket when he had noticed the gross insect staring down at him with his evil, bloodthirsty eyes—okay, maybe not that extreme it was terrible and frightening.

Spiders were the grossest and creepiest things to ever crawl the earth with their four legs and blood sucking lifestyles. Why were they even necessary to live?

Minseok sat frozen, staring up at it—god, this was worse than coming across a weeping angel like in Doctor Who. Having nothing but fear-induced thoughts, he finally began wondering if maybe they could continue to mind their own business. He could continue to read Fruits Basket and the spider could stay away from him. Maybe if he fed the spider, it would leave him in peace. They could coexist, maybe spiders weren’t that bad after all, you never know.

But then it moved.

“HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD! SOMEONE HELP ME, I NEED HELP! OH GOD, IT’S GONNA EAT ME! HELP!” Minseok shrieked loudly, sobbing hysterically as he rolled onto the floor and crawled his way to his bedroom door to escape the clutches of the evil spider.

The thumping of feet barreling down the hall could be heard and soon enough, Luhan, Minseok’s wonderful and loving boyfriend burst into view, kneeling down by a hysterical Minseok.

“Baby, what’s wrong? What happened?” Luhan asked concernedly, wiping the fat tears off from his boyfriend’s face.

“I-It’s in t-there!” Minseok cried, still crying and now shaking in intense fear, “It’s on t-the c-ceiling! It was gonna eat me! Please go kill it!”

Luhan blinked.

“The ceiling?” he mumbled to himself, leaving Minseok in the hall as he entered the bedroom. He looked up and sure enough, a spider was found, about a foot from where Minseok had last seen it.

Luhan chuckled.

“Babe, it’s just a spider,” he said, grabbing tissues from the nightstand and jumping up on the bed before capturing the spider, making sure not the squish it.

“IT’S EVIL!” Minseok yelled at him, “KILL IT, IT WAS GONNA EAT ME!”

“I’m not gonna kill it!” Luhan argued, walking to the window. He threw the tissue into the neighbor’s garden below, mentally wishing the spider a nice flight.

Minseok glared at him, tears already dried but his eyes were left with a bit of redness. “You’re my boyfriend, who is supposed to love me, and do whatever I tell you to,” he said irritably.

Luhan rolled his eyes. “I do love you but I’m not about to kill an innocent spider—”

“INNOCENT, MY ASS!” Minseok but him off, clearly angered. “SPIDERS ARE TERRIBLE CREATURES THAT JUST SHOULDN’T EXIST!”

Luhan walked over to his distressed boyfriend and comfortingly patted his back, “I think it’s time you lie down for a nap.”

“What? I don’t need a nap! I’m not five!”

“Shh, it’s sleepy time now.”

“But I’m not tired!”


	2. To The Rescue (2/2)

Fuck. Shit. Holy fucking shit.

Luhan was frozen. What the hell was he going to do? This was probably the most terrifying experience of his life, and there were plenty of those to choose from.

“Why the fuck did I listen to him?” Luhan cursed under his breath, mentally beating up his boyfriend. “I hate haunted houses, so why the fuck did I come here? I’m so stupid…”

And stupid he was for believing that he would win a champion belt for blindly proving his manliness. Minseok knew how to get his way, and Luhan just knew this was payback for the whole spider fiasco.

Minseok and taken him to this haunted house in town, saying that if Luhan could get through the entire thing without screaming, he would win a shiny champion belt and an entire night of mind blowing, erotic sex—dammit, Luhan was weak to fall for that.

With a small flashlight that barely gave off light at all, Luhan walked through the maze with the terrifying music playing in the background.

“Okay…so far so good…nothing’s here—OH MY GOD!” Luhan shrieked as he turned the corner coming face to face with a plastic mannequin. It wasn’t even a scary one, it had a big smile on its face.

“I don’t wanna be here anymore,” Luhan whined as he pushed onward, whimpering with each step he took. Then he felt something grab his ankle and that’s when he just lost it.

“AAHHH! PLEASE! NO!”

A human dressed as a ghost jumped out of the shadows with a scary roar.

“NO, PLEASE NO! LEAVE ME ALONE!”

Fists pounded on the walls around him.

“I’M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!”

It seemed to go one forever, but finally Luhan found the exit and fell to the ground once in a brightly lit room.

“So,” Minseok said, looking down at him smugly, “How was it, manly man?”

Luhan whimpered pitifully from his spot on the floor, shaking too much to get up. “Don’t make me go back in there, please, oh god, it was so scary,” he cried.

“….Is that water on your pants or did you piss yourself in there?”

Luhan looked down at his clothed crotch, and sure enough, a wet spot had formed there and it definitely didn’t smell like water. “Fuck.”

“Oh my god, you really did piss yourself!” Minseok busted out laughing at his boyfriend’s misfortune.

Luhan pouted as he desperately tried to cover the spot with his shirt, “Stop…”

“Oh my god, that was so funny!”

“No…”


End file.
